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Question: Is it bad etiquettte to keepsake your wedding dress after the wedding was called off?

(Posted by: Got Stronger on 2009-04-02 12:32:24)

My fiance called off the wedding 1 month before the ceremony, 5 months ago. Although I'm finally over the whole thing (including him) an have moved on with my life, I'm still very much in love with the wedding dress (it is fabulous!) and don't want to sell it!!! Friends say that I should get rid of it, but I feel one day my future husband awaits and I will be prepared in advance.....what's wrong with that analogy? Is it bad etiquette? I don't even look at the dress or try it on since Sept 08. It's all zipped up along with the shoes and other assesories and placed at the back of my closet.

Posted by: Jen on 2009-04-02, 12:37:16

No it's fine. Keep the dress, and thank your friends for their caring and concern. If they keep on telling you what to do, tell them to give it a rest.

Posted by: Gail on 2009-04-02, 12:38:21

Think of it like a primary addition to your "Hope chest. " If you love the dress more than who you intended to marry and you feel no bad feelings toward it, then there's no bad juju.

Posted by: eyJude on 2009-04-02, 12:39:12

KEEP IT and keep looking... I wouldn't tell THE NEW bf though that you ALREADY have a dress... he might not understand.

Posted by: katydint on 2009-04-02, 12:39:50

It makes sense to keep it. You're not doing away with yourself...you're still the Best Woman for that Best Guy, wherever he is. If you've already got the Best Dress, so much the better. Best wishes for your long term happiness, glad that man is gone before more damage was done.

Posted by: Sula on 2009-04-02, 12:42:49

It's not as though you wore it or that you are going to do a "Miss Faversham ". Keep it until the right man comes along.

Posted by: tkd4716 on 2009-04-02, 12:42:53

Honestly: New man, then new dress. The old dress is bad luck, just like the old fiance. Get rid of it.

Posted by: dbraunofva on 2009-04-02, 12:52:12

Wedding dresses are expensive. There's nothing wrong with keeping the dress if you haven't used it. It would be another story if you got married in the dress and then also wore it for a second wedding.

Posted by: Tracy M on 2009-04-02, 12:54:52

If it doesn't bother you then keep it but not sure why you want to. It may be a beautiful dress but would you really wear it should you get married in the future? To me I would associate that dress with the wedding that never took place. However, if you are fine with keeping it and perhaps wearing it at your future wedding then do it.

Posted by: Aporia on 2009-04-02, 13:13:28

If you love it, and it fits, then you may do what you choose with it. Just remember, it's YOUR dress and if you want to keep it to get married in, you can. Just because you change grooms doesn't mean you change your taste in beautiful (and expensive) dresses! Thank your friends for their concern and don't bring it up anymore. If they bring it up again, you can just say "Thanks for asking, I've taken care of it ". This means whatever you want it to mean.

Posted by: sophieb on 2009-04-02, 14:01:21

There appears to be a problem and I'm not sure exactly where it is. First of all the male is supposed to purchase the bride-to-be's wedding dress and that's a custom that shows it's the first dress the husband buys the wife. If you paid for that wedding dress then I can see why you want to hold onto it, and you hold onto it for better times, or for the time someone really wants you. But when the next time comes along you need to ask the new man in your life to buy you the wedding dress. Sounds like you're not up on your etiquette. Your friends are right. If I were in your shoes I'd be asking myself why I was so clingy and needy (in having to keep a wedding dress, I mean, can't you be like everyone else and just have a hope chest?)..